Now that you have narrowed down your friends to the perfect wedding party, it is time to choose what each person will wear. Although it is not required that the wedding party wear identical outfits, many couples prefer a uniform look. Traditional tradition dictates that bridesmaids should wear the same outfit or dress. This allows the bride to stand out and makes it easier for wedding guests to identify the bridesmaids. Many couples are letting their bridesmaids pick their dresses, and some even leaving the control to them. This has some benefits, but also has its downsides. This is how you can achieve the look that you desire.
We understand: Your wedding is your big day. It can be easier to keep control than having all your girls wear the same dress. However, there are some benefits to allowing your bridesmaids freedom.
Comfort. Comfort. Your bridesmaids may feel unhappy if the same style works for them. They can pick styles and cuts that fit their bodies if they are able to choose their own dresses.
Confidence. The same goes for confidence. Your bridesmaids will radiate confidence and comfort on your big day if they choose dresses that they feel good in.
Price. Bridal parties often have the most difficult time with money. It can be expensive to be a bridesmaid. If you allow your bridesmaids to choose their dresses, they won’t need to settle on a price that suits everyone’s needs.
This could go a little too far.
Definitely. Nervousness can be caused by allowing your bridesmaids to pick their wedding outfits. It’s not a good idea to have your bridesmaids pick their own outfits. Let your bridesmaids pick their dresses.
Cohesion. You can’t let your bridesmaids pick their dresses. They won’t wear the same gown. This route is a good option if you want to keep your look traditional.
Confusion. It’s not a good idea to have too much of any one thing. The same applies to bridal party freedom. You may be asked a lot of questions about what is acceptable and unacceptable, from color to price to length to materials.
Guidelines for letting bridesmaids choose their own dresses
Be clear with yourself about what you want and don’t want when shopping for a dress.
Do: Be specific.
You told your girls that you wanted them all to wear seafoam green. Great! It’s not great. We mean to be specific when we say “be specific”. Be clear if you have a specific goal in mind. These are some details that you might want to be more clear about.
Color of the dress. It’s fine to have a particular dress color in mind – think pink bridesmaid dresses – but what may look mauve to someone might be more pale violet for another. It can be difficult for bridesmaids not to choose a single color, as it may make it more difficult for them to find the same shade of dresses from different vendors. You might consider creating a color palette with 3-4 complementary colors for your maids. You can also suggest a few vendors for them to choose from.
Length. Some brides don’t mind a variety of hemlines–floor-length, knee-length, mini, midi, etc. Let your bridesmaids know if you prefer all to wear the same length gown. Alternately, let them know if they don’t mind wearing different lengths.
Material. Material. You can add dimension to your look by having different dresses made. Too many materials can be distracting. You can tell people that you don’t want them wearing a jersey knit.
Style. This refers to the degree of formality. Semi-formal gowns are not appropriate for a black-tie ceremony. Make sure you clearly define the dress code.
Clarity is the key. Be prepared to share your ideas and requirements with your bridesmaids before you tell them they can pick their own dresses.
Do it as a group activity.
Make a day of it! Start with brunch, then head to the shops. You can keep it simple by choosing a few boutiques for your shopping trip. Noting: You may need to make appointments in advance. You can also share your immediate impressions with your bridesmaids by being there in person. This is not only a fun activity for the wedding party, but it can also help busy bridesmaids make time to shop and give nudges to those who procrastinate.
It’s okay if your bridesmaids live far away or are unable to make it on the shopping day. You might consider scheduling Facetime to chat with them while they shop. If you don’t have one already, you can create a group chat to go shopping.
Do: Final check-in
The hair and makeup tests, the catering and cake samplings, as well as the check-in of the bridesmaid dresses, are all part of the process. Before anything can be finalized, it’s always a good idea for everyone to get on the same page. Before your bridesmaids make their final dresses, ensure they run them by you. You can then see if the dress fits your vision and theme. This will eliminate stress and unnecessary surprises.
Your bridesmaids should be given a deadline for their final dress-check-in. Although it sounds like a bad idea, it is actually a good move for them. Everyone should have enough time to find a new gown or make any necessary adjustments. Your check-in should be scheduled at least seven months before the wedding.
Do not forget about the cost.
The idea of letting your bridesmaids pick their own dresses might help to reduce the financial burden. A bride could provide a list (3-5) of vendors to the bridal party. Consider selecting the options that you like in a range of price points if you choose this route. Consider the financial situation of your party and be open to discussing it.
Do not: Don’t ignore shoes and accessories.
The bridesmaid dress is not the only thing that matters. Accessory are key, especially if you want to create a mismatched look for your bridesmaid dresses. A pair of shoes, or a particular shoe style and color, is a great way to bring harmony to your bridal party. You don’t need to have a specific shoe in mind. Be clear about your style preferences. You can avoid having one girl wear heels and another wearing flats. If one of your bridesmaids must wear flats because of a personal reason, however, we recommend that she be heard out on it. You may also want your bridal party to wear sneakers or flats. You just need to make sure that you are aligned.
Let your bridesmaids also know what jewelry you like or don’t like. Traditionally, the bride will buy and gift the jewelry she wants to her bridesmaids. You can also let them pick their own jewelry. As always, be specific about your style.
Do not get complicated
It shouldn’t be difficult or stressful for your bridesmaids to choose their own gowns. It should make your life a lot easier. These girls are your bridesmaids and want to make your wedding day a success. You can trust them that they have it under control, and let them really take charge of this one. (Don’t forget about to thank them for all their hard work during the planning process.
They might even choose a dress that they love so much they will wear it again. This is the ideal scenario for bridesmaid dresses.
